Priceless

It is so unlike me to not fiddle around with the vehicle I drive at least once a month. I think the most I’ve done to the van I purchased nearly one year ago is washing it. It needs a tune-up real bad, but the weather and doctors and everyday activities have prevented me from finding the time to dive into the job. My biggest excuse is that the sun goes down too early keeping me from working in the evenings. Probably the main reason for my procrastination is the difficulty factor involved with changing the spark plugs on a sideways V-6 engine. I’m not as flexible as I used to be. Unlike the old days you have to actually roll the engine over to get to the plugs against the firewall. I’ll get it done soon, I hope. Maybe Punxsutawney Phil will be kind to us this year.
Changing oil in the car is still about the same job. Women go to the Quick Lube, drink a cup of coffee and in fifteen minutes they’re on the way. Total cost; Oil Change $20.00 + Coffee $1.00 = $21.00. Men don’t trust the lube dudes to do the job correctly so they do it themselves. Saturday: Drive to the parts store, buy 1 case of motor oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner, and a scented tree; $50.00. Stop by 7-11 for case of beer; $20.00, drive home. Drink 1 beer. Jack up car. Look 30 minutes for jack stands; find them under peddle car. In frustration, drink 1 more beer. Place drain pan under car, look for 5/8” box wrench, give up, use crescent wrench. Unscrew drain plug, drop it in hot oil draining from engine splashing it all over you. Clean self up, throw some kitty liter on spilt oil and drink another beer watching oil drain. Can’t find oil filter wrench so decide to drive screwdriver through filter with hammer to loosen filter. In the process more hot oil sprays everywhere. Clean self up, again, and spread kitty liter on spilt oil. Dump oil in hole in back yard and remember to hide filter under trash in can in fear of environmental snitches. Buddy shows up; finish off the case of beer then go to his house to see his new garage door opener. Finish oil change tomorrow. Sunday: Skip church; “I gotta finish the oil change.” Beer? No, drank it yesterday. Go to 7-11 to buy beer. Too early. Stand around for 30 minutes waiting on Blue Law, drive home with beer. Install new filter remembering to coat seal with oil. Start filling engine with new oil; suddenly remember not installing drain plug. Find drain plug in hole in back yard. Spread kitty liter on spilt oil, install plug. Drink 1 beer while beating self up for being so stupid; 1 more beer. Dump in five fresh quarts of oil. Rest and have a beer. Lower car from jack stands and accidently crush remaining case of oil. Move car to apply rest of kitty liter to oil on floor. Test drive car and get stopped by police; get charged with DWI. Cost: Parts $50.00; DWI $2500.00; Impound Fee $75.00; Bail $1500.00; Beer $40.00. Total: $4165.00. Knowing the job got done “right” – Priceless?
[John 6: 60-70] Earlier in this chapter, Jesus was describing exactly who he was and what his ministry was all about. Many around him complained, “…This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?” Jesus has also taught, “…For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11: 28-30). I will not leave myself out when I say man is always thinking he has a better way of doing things to obtain the same results. Going to heaven cannot be accomplished any other way than God’s way and that’s the message Jesus brought to us. Try hard as you might, nobody can change God’s will. Repentance and baptism cannot be sidetracked. Faith, hope and love are priceless in God’s will.

God's Cleansing Power

If it weren’t for women most of us guys would still be living in a cave sitting around deciding if we were hungry enough to go hunting or not. My domestic training over the years has netted a guy willing to help with the dishes, do a little cooking, push a cart through the grocery store, alone, without embarrassment and do some laundry without running colors or melting elastic waste bands. Of course, training started very early in life with domestic chores around the house every day. The recent cold weather brought to mind the day I helped with the laundry. I don’t remember why I was involved, but do know it was a very cold day and for some reason my mother wouldn’t let me out of her sight. Anyway, I remember the wringer washer, big tubs to catch the clothes as they exited the wringer squeezing out the soapy water. Then the washer got emptied and refilled with clean hot water for rinsing the laundry and another run through the wringer to squeeze the water out. That day mom was washing bed sheets, huge pieces of cloth to a little guy. The final rinse and run through the wringer had to be done just so, positioning the big sheets in the big laundry basket in a way that hanging them on the clothes line outside was a little easier. I helped lifting the sheets out of the basket as my mother attached the sheets to the clothesline with those wooden clothespins. The sun was warm, but the air was cold and I couldn’t wait to get back inside the house. Well, for the cold weather part. About the time my mother figured the sheets should be dry, hanging in that beautiful sunshine, we found them frozen stiff as a board. If I remember right, the sheets hung there for several days, even through a snow storm before the sun and wind thawed and dried them. Doing the laundry is easy now-a-days.
A lady was showing her visiting church friend her neighbor’s wash through her kitchen window. “They’re not very clean people”, the lady said. “Just look at the streaks on that wash!” The friend reluctantly looked and then softly said, “Dear, those streaks aren’t on your neighbors wash. They’re on your window.”
[1 Corinthians 6: 9-11] If it weren’t for the Word of God I would still be in the clutches of the evil one sitting around trying to decide if it was really worth the effort to go on living. It really does get that bad when one has no hope of ever finding true happiness. Spiritual training, and I’m going to call it that because I continue to experience epiphanies of rational truths that better my life as a whole. When I first came to the Lord I realized my sinful nature and the need for cleansing of the spirit through baptism (Acts 2:37-41). It felt as though a heavy weight had been lifted off my shoulders and life was anew. But then the devil took me back to the world and hung me out in the cold with a cruel personal attack to test my new found faith. Let me tell you, I froze to death. Life dealt me a miserable hand and I folded. I felt dirty, even though I hadn’t done anything wrong. My spirit was in worse condition than before. But I never gave up. I continued to walk in the sunshine as often as possible trying to thaw out my hardened heart. Then I learned to walk in the Son again. Since I quit trying to find a cleansing solution in the world and returned to the Word for guidance and answers I don’t fear the cold of the world anymore. Read, 2 Corinthians 4. Unlike our temporal bodies and possessions that can become soiled beyond our ability to cleanse, our eternal soul is never beyond God’s cleansing power. Are you cleansed in His power?

Horsepower

While the weather has me cooped up in the house waiting on Daytona to fire up the beginning of another NASCAR season, it’s time for Detroit and the world auto-makers to show off their new “stock cars”. Even though most cars are starting to look alike, I’ve got to give the manufactures thumbs up in the design department. Feeding the same materials into computers, fuel mileage, aerodynamics, weight, wheelbase and so forth has all the computers spitting out the same basic design for automobiles, hence they look the same. But lately the manufacture is conceiving ways to give their products character, making them readily recognizable from a distance, like the good old days. Plastic, aluminum, fiberglass and other fiber composites are giving designers ways to build autos like never before. And like the good old days, there’s horsepower again, but unlike days past, with fuel mileage. Four cylinder engines are putting out 200 horses, V6 engines 300 horses and when turbo assisted 400 horses! Better than the good old days. The only problem I see with the technical advances of the past ten years is, getting one of these cars fixed will be like buying it all over again. Good luck with that! One good thing about this years’ auto show, no new SUV’s or “land yachts” or gas guzzling limo stretched pick-up trucks. I can hear the racing engines already.
“Dad”, exclaimed the 16 year-old boy on the phone. “I can’t get the car started. I think it’s flooded” To which the father replied, “Where’s the car?” Sheepishly the boy said, “It was in the lake.” Calmly the father said, “You’re probably right, it’s flooded.”
A man found a bottle, rubbed it and out popped a genie. The genie said, “Ask me for what you wish, for I can grant it.” The man said, “I fear flying and would very much like to visit Hawaii, could you build a bridge for me?” Genie: “Oh, that’s a tough one. Is there another wish you have?” Man: “I’ve never understood women. Could you explain them to me?” Genie: “Would you like that to be a two or four lane bridge?”
A senior citizen was driving down the freeway when his cell phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife franticly warning him, “Lloyd, I just heard on the news that there’s some fool driving the wrong way on the road you always travel!” To which Lloyd urgently replied, “It’s not just one car! It’s hundreds of them!”
[Colossians 2: 6 - 4: 6] As a Christian, I at times feel like I’m on the road to forever going the wrong way. I’ve lived long enough to see religion and the church go through a lot of design changes brought about by men and women who feel that changes need to be made to conform to changing times. “The church is too old fashion. We need to modernize it to fit today’s culture.” All I can say to that is those people seem to forget that the church is not of the world and doesn’t have to conform to anything in this world to be the church. What I read in the Bible is that I must conform to the regulations of the church to become a part of the church. It is I who must change not the church. The world is constantly enticing me to conform to its activities, which frankly makes me sick to see so many people simply giving in to the idea that there is no right or wrong to govern consciousness and integrity. Well, although it may seem at times I’m swimming upstream I still know where I’m going. Some people want to make you think you’re missing out on the fun, but I’m working on an eternal reward that will never let me down. The genuine love of my Lord is all the horsepower I need.

Are You Speeding?

My last couple of trips to the big city have netted a few revelations. One being quite obvious that, it must be true, small communities are suffering financial woes just by the presence of the police cars along the side of the highway delivering speeding and other tickets of motor vehicle operational violations. The second is that three dollar a gallon fuel has slowed the highway traveling pace by about ten miles per hour. I had noticed on earlier trips during the holidays that I was passing several more cars than usual on the two lane. Soon after, I filled my fuel tank and was face to face with the reality of the price increase since my last fill-up. My lead-foot has become light as a feather and I’m no longer spending my travel time to the big city in the show-off lane. At sixty miles per hour very few vehicles are zipping down the road much faster. I was thinking about making a sign to hang in the window of my van for those who are still flying low down the highway: “YOU’RE ONE OF THE REASONS GAS COSTS $3 A GALLON!” Maybe it’s just me, getting old and slow. NOT! I’m like you, where will it all end and is there anything I can do to better the situation. I do know if I don’t accelerate hard and slow down, my $3 a gallon gas goes much farther.
A man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure traveling in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer obtained the man’s license, registration and proof of insurance then returned to his patrol car. A few minutes later the officer returned the man’s documents, handed the him a citation for speeding, received his signature and was about to walk away when the man asked, “Officer, I know I was speeding, but I don’t think it’s fair. There were plenty of other cars around me going just as fast, so why did I get the ticket?” The officer asked, “Ever go fishing?” Startled, the man stammered, “Well, yeah…” The officer interrupted and added, “Did you ever catch all the fish?”
A minister was stopped by a law enforcement officer, who pulled him over for speeding. As the officer was writing the ticket the minister said to him, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy.” The officer handed the minister the citation and said, “Go in peace my friend and speed no more.”
[Matthew 7: 13-14] The doctor says, “Slow down!” We speed up. The doctor warns that worry and stress is bad for the heart, but we just have to keep up with the Jones’. The doctor begs us to lose weight and eat better, but who has the time? It’s such a shame to watch people go through life as if it’s a race of fame and fortune. Oh, I know the Bible calls life a race, but learn the truth! Life is an endurance race. How many times will it take, seeing others getting caught for speeding and ticketed with heart-attacks, high blood-pressure, stroke, high cholesterol, diabetes, reparatory and numerous other physical problems, simply because they don’t heed the warnings, before we wake up? Walking the narrow path is good for the physical health of everyone and is essential for everyone’s spiritual health and the spiritual life to come, “…for broad is the road that leads to destruction.” Are you prepared to suffer the devastation of a debilitating physical meltdown? Are you ready to spend forever in the clutches of eternal death? You think it’s time for a physical and spiritual make-over?

New Year, New Goals

Here we are already plunged into another year of uncertainty yet pressing forward with plans and ideas to better our way of life. I know I’m not alone when I say I have a list of things I wish to accomplish throughout this year. My goals for the year vary from “I’d like to do this or that” to “I’ve got to get this or that done without fail”. It still doesn’t mean all of my goals will get fulfilled, because it seems without fail, circumstances of life change our focus and direction sometimes on a daily bases. I try to be careful with my goals, to make them challenging but not impossible to reach. And, as good as I feel about my goals, I have to remind myself I’m not a failure if when I look back on 2011, I haven’t checked off everything on my list. I always look back on life and ask myself, “Did you live a respectable life last year?” I think that’s where we all start a new year, wanting to be a better person. Living healthier and refining relationships are generally on the top of most lists and unfortunately are among the first to get pushed aside. Nevertheless, I try to work my goals as long as I can, because it feels so good to have a promise to ones self blossom and grow.
A sign in an office window read, “Help Wanted. Must type 70 words a minute; Must be computer literate and bilingual; Equal Opportunity Employer. A dog was ambling down the street and saw the sign. He looked at it for a moment then pulled it down with his mouth and walked into the manager’s office. The office manager laughed and said, “I can’t hire a dog for this job.” The dog pointed to the line, “Equal Opportunity Employer”. So the manager said, “OK, type this letter for me.” The dog sat at the computer and a minute later had a finished perfectly formatted letter. The manager wasn’t convinced. “I still can’t hire you for the position. You have to be bilingual.” The dog looked up at the manager and said, “Meow.”
“Congratulations Mr. Smith. I think we have finally and completely cured you of your delusion.” said the Psychiatrist. “Thanks, I guess”, answered Mr. Smith grimly. “So, what’s wrong? Why are you so depressed?” asked the psychiatrist. “Wouldn’t you be down if one day you were the President and the next day you’re nobody?"
“Now how many of you would like to go to heaven?” asked the Sunday school teacher. All the eager three-year-olds raised their hands except Helen. “I’m sorry, I can’t. My mommy told me to come right home today after Sunday school.”
[Proverbs 23] (v4&5) “Do not wear yourself out to get rich; have the wisdom to show restraint. Cast but a glance at riches, and they are gone, for they will surely sprout wings and fly off to the sky like an eagle.” (v12) “Apply your heart to instruction and your ears to words of knowledge.” (v17&18) “Do not let your heart envy sinners, but always be zealous for the fear of the Lord. There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off.”(v23) “Buy the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline and understanding.” The Proverbs are amazing writings. When I read them I can see myself as I was, as I am, and as whom I can become. The strength and guidance I need to live day to day comes from God’s Word. I have been lifted from the debts of despair and sinful living to a height of hope and righteous living. My greatest goal every day is to please God in all I do and say. I occasionally fail, but I refuse to give up. My trust and my riches are in the Lord, who will deliver me from sin.