Saturday, January 29, 2011

Priceless

It is so unlike me to not fiddle around with the vehicle I drive at least once a month. I think the most I’ve done to the van I purchased nearly one year ago is washing it. It needs a tune-up real bad, but the weather and doctors and everyday activities have prevented me from finding the time to dive into the job. My biggest excuse is that the sun goes down too early keeping me from working in the evenings. Probably the main reason for my procrastination is the difficulty factor involved with changing the spark plugs on a sideways V-6 engine. I’m not as flexible as I used to be. Unlike the old days you have to actually roll the engine over to get to the plugs against the firewall. I’ll get it done soon, I hope. Maybe Punxsutawney Phil will be kind to us this year.
Changing oil in the car is still about the same job. Women go to the Quick Lube, drink a cup of coffee and in fifteen minutes they’re on the way. Total cost; Oil Change $20.00 + Coffee $1.00 = $21.00. Men don’t trust the lube dudes to do the job correctly so they do it themselves. Saturday: Drive to the parts store, buy 1 case of motor oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner, and a scented tree; $50.00. Stop by 7-11 for case of beer; $20.00, drive home. Drink 1 beer. Jack up car. Look 30 minutes for jack stands; find them under peddle car. In frustration, drink 1 more beer. Place drain pan under car, look for 5/8” box wrench, give up, use crescent wrench. Unscrew drain plug, drop it in hot oil draining from engine splashing it all over you. Clean self up, throw some kitty liter on spilt oil and drink another beer watching oil drain. Can’t find oil filter wrench so decide to drive screwdriver through filter with hammer to loosen filter. In the process more hot oil sprays everywhere. Clean self up, again, and spread kitty liter on spilt oil. Dump oil in hole in back yard and remember to hide filter under trash in can in fear of environmental snitches. Buddy shows up; finish off the case of beer then go to his house to see his new garage door opener. Finish oil change tomorrow. Sunday: Skip church; “I gotta finish the oil change.” Beer? No, drank it yesterday. Go to 7-11 to buy beer. Too early. Stand around for 30 minutes waiting on Blue Law, drive home with beer. Install new filter remembering to coat seal with oil. Start filling engine with new oil; suddenly remember not installing drain plug. Find drain plug in hole in back yard. Spread kitty liter on spilt oil, install plug. Drink 1 beer while beating self up for being so stupid; 1 more beer. Dump in five fresh quarts of oil. Rest and have a beer. Lower car from jack stands and accidently crush remaining case of oil. Move car to apply rest of kitty liter to oil on floor. Test drive car and get stopped by police; get charged with DWI. Cost: Parts $50.00; DWI $2500.00; Impound Fee $75.00; Bail $1500.00; Beer $40.00. Total: $4165.00. Knowing the job got done “right” – Priceless?
[John 6: 60-70] Earlier in this chapter, Jesus was describing exactly who he was and what his ministry was all about. Many around him complained, “…This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?” Jesus has also taught, “…For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11: 28-30). I will not leave myself out when I say man is always thinking he has a better way of doing things to obtain the same results. Going to heaven cannot be accomplished any other way than God’s way and that’s the message Jesus brought to us. Try hard as you might, nobody can change God’s will. Repentance and baptism cannot be sidetracked. Faith, hope and love are priceless in God’s will.

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